It's a good reflective story for me to watch, in which I saw hints of this forgetfulness on my own life. One prime example is the fact that I forgot to bring my running pants to the gym this past week when I had already planned to run. twice. Twice I had to go back home, grab my shorts, and drive back to the gym to start my work out. It's a scary thought for me if I were to be consumed by Alzheimer's disease in my latter year. Why is it scary?
Because memory is of prime importance in my own life. When I TA, I tried my best to remember each students name, so that they know that they are not just a number: they are a person that is in the process of learning a material (and a way of thinking) that they'd use when they get out of college. When I do research, I'd have to use my memory to recall all the data that I need and tried to connect the dots so that I can see the bigger picture and not get lost in the details. When I pray, "Open my lips and my mouth shall declare Your praise." reminds me of Psalm 51, where David prays for forgiveness and for mercy from God after his sinful act of killing Uriah and taking Batsheba from him. Memory is in and of itself my identity, my way to connect with the mystery of life as I live it here at this moment.
So yes: scary if I were to ever have to deal with a memory loss, a brain tumor, or Alzheimer's disease. I still even remembers that I wanted to get a CT scan of my own brain when I was in Singapore with my mom during her cancer treatment, but I chose not to. I figured that my brain hurts just because I was under a really stressful times at that point and it's just my fear eating away my very own self.
Instead, I would love to mimic and follow the example of what Blessed John XXII did when he couldn't sleep: He'd say to himself,
"Who's in charge: you or God?
God!
Then go back to sleep, Giovanni!"
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